Where to start?

I have lots of random thoughts that come flooding back now that I think about it, but what do I write about first?

On some level, I've always known I wanted to be a girl. I might not have been able to put it into words, but as soon as I could grasp(even on the most basic level) the idea that boys and girls are different, I knew I wasn't comfortable with the hand I was dealt. By this point I wasn't obsessed. I was too young to really understand just what it all meant, but something inside me did.

It's.. a very strange dream I had. I recall it being before I was in kindergarten.. or maybe when I was. I was quite young at any rate. Certainly not past first grade.

The dream is still very vivid in my own mind.. even now. I remember walking into the room with the washer and dryer in it. Everything seemed normal, but when I closed the door the lights went out. No window.. so it was pitch black. I'm stuck in this tiny room in the darkness.. when suddenly the floor opens up and I drop down. I landed on a long table, and I am immediately strapped in. Metal cuffs at the ankles and wrists. I look over and see a mad scientist of some sort at a machine. He remarks that I will make a pretty girl. My hair grows out into lovely bond locks... and I'm suddenly in a pretty little dress. I can feel my breathing speed up and my heart pound in the dream. A strange mixture of fear over what was happening and being thrilled beyond imagination. I wake up immediately after the dress is on. As soon as I realize it was a dream I become a bit disappointed. I had hoped to wake up and find I had turned into a girl.

It was my wakeup call. I realized I desperately wanted to be a girl.. and I couldn't even tie my own shoes yet!

It was cute dress too. Think Dorothy from The Wizard of Oz. Something like that. I REALLY wanted that damn dress, dammit.